The Power of Forgiveness

Sharing this article on Forgiveness I wrote some time ago for A Beautiful Life Magazine.  I find it is forever relevant in our lives, especially as we move into a new Year.Have a Happy, Healthy, safe and Prosperous 2021. 

Love and Blessings,

Sharon

The Power of Forgiveness

By forgiving, you are giving yourself a wonderful gift of peace and harmony.

The gift you give yourself this Holiday Season.

The Forgiveness theme has been floating around in my mind for quite some time now, and I was very resistant to writing about it. Why? I really have no answer, so “why not!” Here goes.

Many of you may relate to this. Once given a “message” to do something, it does not let up until you follow through with it. I got a big push to write this. The Universe went so far as to put Forgiveness in my line of sight daily, with many articles on the subject ‘jumping out’ at me for weeks. So dear readers, here goes my take on what I know and what I have learned over the years about The Power of Forgiveness.

Forgiveness is one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself!

When you rid yourself of worrying or resenting an individual by Forgiving them for something they may have done or said to you, it is similar to a bag of cement falling away from your shoulders. Just imagine living, walking, working, sleeping, carrying that heavy load day after day. Once the load is gone, you lose pounds – literally. You will feel lighter, happier and walk with a new bounce in your step. People around you will notice the difference and will comment on how you have changed.

Apologize – another form of Forgiveness. I have found that rather than insist on being right, even when I know I am, I flip the energy around by offering an apology! The other person is often surprised, so next time, Try it! You may find you have ‘taken the wind out of their sails’ by doing so. I call this loving yourself for refusing to engage negatively. You do not want to be ‘dragging around resentments like a heavy ball and chain.’

It has been said that “holding unforgiveness is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die.” Don’t take that poison! Forgive, apologize, forget and move on with your life. You are worth it!

Do not hold the opinion that Forgiveness releases the person who hurt you from blame.

Not at all! You have forgiven! Not forgotten! By forgiving, you have given yourself a wonderful gift of peace and harmony and released the negative energy associated with the experience.

Here is something very profound I read some time ago that makes so much sense. “Scientists, physicians, and psychologists who have researched the relationship between stress and illness have concluded that the ability or inability to forgive affects the outcome of serious illness. People who have a forgiving nature increase their chances of recovery.” Very interesting!

I have heard people say to me, “I will never forgive or forget” when they are sad or angry at someone who has hurt them. It saddens me for them because I sense the bitterness they are holding on to in their lives.

There is no inner peace while negative energy is choking that inner peace out.

My advice is always, “Please try to Forgive. You need not forget! Love yourself and know that every moment you spend upset, anguished, angry, worried or hurt because of someone else’s behaviour is a moment in which you have chosen to give up control of your life. You are special! Reclaim your power! There is no one like you, and there never will be. Please think of Forgiveness as the gift you give yourself!”

Here is a short Forgiveness Exercise you may find useful. Find a quiet place where you can sit for 5 minutes or so uninterrupted. Start by blessing everything in your life, your family, friends, supportive people, job, money, pets, your health and whatever you feel blessed having even the trees and Mother Nature. Then say:“ I bless everything in my life. (You may want to repeat what you feel blessed having and doing) All blessings are multiplied in my life. I feel a tremendous surge of this beautiful blessed energy flowing through and around me. My life now goes forward in joy, peace and prosperity. I attract to myself only that which is for my Highest Good. And So It Is!” You may wish to repeat it several times during the day.

May you welcome 2021 free from the negativity of unforgiveness, and may it be a Powerful New Beginning for you. My New Year Wishes for you are: May you soar to new and exciting heights in all your endeavours, and may your Mantra for 2019 be “I GIVE MYSELF PERMISSION TO BE ABUNDANT, HEALTHY AND PROSPEROUS.”

May you always walk gently in sandals of love!

Namaste,

Sharon deRyck

www.healing-path-centre.com

p.s. I would love to hear your thoughts on Forgiveness and how Forgiveness has changed your life.

YOU ARE ENOUGH!

You Are EnoughI am Enough!  We are all enough, because we are unique and special.  No two people are exactly the same.  Each one of us is irreplaceable and exceptionally rare in a species where no two have the same finger prints – not even twins I’m told.

Watching an episode of one of my favourite shows, The Long Island Medium in which her teenage daughter was constantly ‘body shamed’ by her peers reminded me of a prior conversation with a teenager a few years ago.  This young girl was feeling hurt due to having experienced the same treatment from her very close friends at school. This encounter emphasized that it is important to teach our youth, especially the girls, who are so critical of themselves and other girls who they feel do not measure up to the image of what beauty is supposed to look like. e.g. The Air Brushed Fantasy!

Beauty comes in many shapes and sizes.  Criticizing someone for their shape, weight or dress style is very hurtful.  Many have no filters and can be extremely cruel in their criticism of others, quite often to their friends.  What they must be taught in school and at home is that no two people are made exactly the same. Humans come in all shapes, sizes and yes colours as well! And that is where the beauty of diversity is so pronounced and special. They must be taught that EVERYONE  is very special in their uniqueness and it is this difference that makes everyone so special. I feel if they were taught to embrace the diversity in others from a very young age, we would have a far kinder world.

This brings me to another very important fact. Many teenage girls are very hard on themselves.  They want to measure up to what their friend’s idea of perfection is. The Air Brushed Fantasy paraded on the television daily. Imagine being with a healthy, beautiful 14 year old with a lovely unblemished complexion, long vibrant dark hair framing her face constantly saying self-consciously, “I’m so fat”.  Yes. I had that experience and it shocked me. There was this lovely young girl picking at her food because she somehow got it planted in the neuro pathways of her brain that she is fat.  No amount of my telling her she is perfect in every way seemed to reach that part of her brain to boost her self-esteem. I realized it was no use trying, because at that age ones friend’s always knows best. (She is 18 and definitely her own person now).

Social Media and its tentacles reaching far and wide into everyone’s lives have brought with it the era we now define as ‘body shaming’.  Teenagers have to put up with their so called “friends” shaming them without filters even on Face Book.  That can be quite hurtful and damaging to their fragile young egos.  Sadly, there will always be one in every group who takes on the role of the fashion and body shaming Deva.  A tactic used to deflect from their personal insecurity.  That is why It is so important to teach our youth not to be critical of others as well as themselves.

Just because that “look” is what one individual finds they need to define who they are, is no reason to project it on to someone else.  Unfortunately, it is not just among the younger generation.  I had the rude awakening myself when one of my friends kept hinting that she wants to “jazz up my look”. Clothes, hair the lot – a make-over! Bless her heart!  I did not realize that once widowed, one needs to be jazzed up for the “out there look”.  Whatever that is! There is no way I am going to start dressing like a 20 year old because someone else does. I am uniquely me. I have no intention of having my hair styled falling in my face to please someone else. My response is always with a smile and a chuckle, ‘thanks, but no thanks’.

No doubt, if I were a preteen or teenager that would have been a blow to my ego, thinking “what is wrong with my hair”?  Today, I see it for what it is, someone trying to fit me into their preconceived box, while taking away my uniqueness.  It is important we all be uniquely who we are, and not try to imitate another or try to make someone into something they are not.  Let us all celebrate each other’s uniqueness because we are all very special.

I am passionate that we must help the younger generation build confidence in their uniqueness in order to deflect any rude ‘body shaming’ remarks directed at them.  As adults we must instill in them a sense of self love and self- respect.  Admiration that they are Special!  Everyone is Special! Everyone is unique!  We are all Enough!

Here are some verses from I’m Special. I came across I’m Special many years ago and have loved sharing it in workshops and with clients.

I’m Special.  In all the world there is nobody like me.  Since the beginning of time, there has never been another person like me.  Nobody has my smile, my eyes, my nose or my voice.

I’m Special.  I’m the only one in all creation who has my set of abilities.  Oh, there will always be somebody who is better at one of the things I’m good at, but no one in the Universe can reach the quality of my combination of talents, ideas, abilities and feelings.

I’m a Symphony.  Through all of eternity no one will look, talk, walk, think or be like me.

I’m Special.    I’m Rare.   In rarity there is great value.  Because of my great rare value, I need not attempt to copy or imitate another.  I need not feel inferior to anyone because I am unique. I am Rare and I am Special.

May you always walk gently in sandals of Love.

Sharon

Power Talk

Power Talk

Your way to success in every aspect of your life.

It was 30 years or more ago that I attended a wonderful Seminar by Career Track called Power Talk that alerted me to the power of words and phrases. I was shocked to find out that many of my expressions and the words I used in my daily interactions were considered by the trainer running the course to be Powerless! It was quite a shock to me to realize that I was speaking and not really making an impression. In fact, I lacked what today is called the WOW factor!

That Power Talk Seminar was a life-changing and a life-enhancing experience for me. Here I was the Executive Assistant to the director of Human Resources of a large US company and one of my most important job functions was interviewing and signing up every new employee in Ontario. Of course, we had a company spiel that I followed for inductions. However, after that Seminar, I must admit my presentations were given with flair and a lot more power phrases. I deleted what was termed Powerless phrases, words and expressions from my presentation and injected instead some Power Talk. I started to watch what came out of my mouth, and how I presented the company and its amazing benefits to new employees. I noticed that I held the attention of the inductees 100 percent and it became a dialogue of questions and answers instead of just them listening to the old spiel.

One powerless phrase that the presenter hammered into our heads to get rid of was “I will try!” It is absolutely one of the most powerless phrases there is. Instead, a power talker would say “Do leave it with me ………………..”. Another powerless phrase is “I’m not sure!” a Power Talker would respond positively with something like “It will be interesting to find the answer to that!” I have no doubt we can all think of countless ways to be enthusiastic and answer with Power Talk phrases.

Power Talkers must be aware to use their voice for Emphasis when speaking. It is advisable to not use words that cloud or hide the message you are trying to convey. Speaking too fast and too loud sometimes actually loses the attention of the person or persons you are talking to. They will start tuning you out, so it is advisable to slow down and lower your volume if you want to catch their attention for a point you are making.
Today 30 years later we have progressed on the Power Talk circuit to knowing and understanding the energy of words. We can now consciously delete words from our vocabulary which are considered low vibration or powerless words and instead use only those words that are of a high vibration.

Many of us know from experience that school was not meant to teach us how to succeed in life. I cannot recall any of my teachers explaining that words have energy and that high vibrational words carve a path to succeeding and attaining one’s goals. Today we know that simply by programming the brain using high vibrational words, and phrases, we can attract positive results in our everyday life situations. On the other side of the equation, low vibration words and sentences when used continually only serves to attract negative results.

After the Career Track Seminar, I became the speaker and the watcher. Whenever a negative word or phrase left my lips unconsciously, I made a mental note to not repeat it a second time. Years later when I read Yvonne Oswald’s wonderful book Every Word Has Power, I started using the word Switch to alert me when I unconsciously found myself falling into the low vibration word zone.

In mentoring and presenting Motivational workshops I came to realize there were words and phrases that had to be avoided and deleted from people’s vocabulary. In order to set goals and use only positive life and career-affirming words and phrases, I mentored individuals to totally remove from their daily way of expressing themselves what I termed P.O.M.’s (Poor Old Me) using low vibrational words and phrases. The energy of those words and phrases felt heavy and burdensome. I imagined them weighing the individuals down and keeping them stuck in all areas of their lives. The transformation from low vibration to high vibration words and phrases when they talked made such a huge difference in their lives and careers. Indeed! Words do have power!

I would love for you to share how you changed from Low Vibrational talk to become a Power Talker.

Namaste,

Sharon

Happy Fall and Thanksgiving

Happy Fall and Happy Thanksgiving. I wrote this Blog some years ago however it is so appropriate at this time. I am resending it because I am in an intense period of CHANGE that is taking up every hour of every day of my life. This Change though expected in everyone’s life, when it comes is often unexpected. I am fully engaged in this Change and am savouring every precious moment. It is profound and a great teacher of selfless love. I know I will be wiser, more compassionate and stronger than ever before when this intense Tide of Change becomes a serene ocean of beautiful memories.

Love and Peace to all.

Namaste Sharon

Autumn a time for Change and Gratitude

Autumn a time for Change and Gratitude

Autumn is the season of change.  As I welcome autumn and as Thanksgiving approaches, I am again reminded of all that I have to be grateful for.  I am grateful for me, myself in all my perfections and imperfections.  That is what makes me unique just like each one of you is so unique.   I hope as you read this you tell yourself how wonderful and unique you are and say how grateful you are for you!

I am blessed to live in a society and culture where there is so much to support a happy and fulfilling lifestyle.  One of the things in my life I am always grateful for is my soft clean beautiful bed and the clean soft sheets, my pillows and yes the pillowcases that cradle my head when I fall off to sleep.  Each night as I snuggle down to sleep I feel so much gratitude for my bed as I bless the day just ended.  It is often the first thank you that comes from my heart as my body prepares to end the day in its warmth and welcoming folds.  That may not seem like a big deal to many people, however to me along with a roof to keep out the rain and the elements it is one of the many, many things I am very grateful for in my life.

I am so happy that this deep gratitude proceeded a conversation I had last year with a group of seniors in the Senior Centre in Newmarket where I attend a Zumba class.  I saw a group of ladies working with a huge collection of plastic milk bags that we all throw in the garbage. There were bags everywhere, and what seemed like junk to me soon became something more amazing than mere words can convey.  These ladies were cutting these bags, preparing them to weave on a giant loom they were working on.  Fascinated I went to take a look and was shown how they weave the plastic into sleeping mats for women in third world countries and this lot was destined for Haiti.  They also made bags for the women and what was so incredible, both the mats and the bags were waterproof. YES! Those useless milk bags that we disposed of in the garbage were being fashioned into the most colourful and thoughtful of gifts for those who lacked the mere necessities of life.  Imagine how happy and grateful those Haitian women were at receiving beautiful plastic mats to sleep on that prevented water from leaking through as they slept on the floor of their mud huts and a waterproof bag to hold their belongings.

There are countless  more things in my life that I am grateful for including my wonderful supportive family that I am blessed with, my husband and our 3 very wise sons, their partners and our forever 3 grandchildren whose knowledge of computers and the latest technology help me to keep up with the rest of the world : ).

There is much gratitude in my heart for the years I have lived on this beautiful earth.  As a late bloomer, I know that In order to blossom and grow towards my full potential it takes work.  Most of all it takes change.  Scary and Necessary…Yes ..Very!

For me, autumn is all about Change and Gratitude and both promotes growth.  It’s a time to rid myself of all that no longer serves me. It means taking stock of all areas of my life physical, emotional, mental, professional and other areas that need attention in order for new growth to flourish.  It means joyously releasing all that will no longer be needed in the next season(s) of my life and trusting the path I have chosen to be for my highest and best.

As one of my favourite poets, Patience Strong wrote: “The best is never over, the best is yet to be.”

What are you most grateful for and what best changes are you looking forward to in the next season of your life?  I would love to hear from you.

Namaste,

Sharon

 

“To Optimum Health and Well-being“

To Optimum Health and Well Being by Sharon deRyckIn January I made a promise to myself that 2017 was going to be the year that I pay extra close attention to keeping healthy in Body, Mind and Spirit and loving every minute of it.   Not that I was lax in years gone by, it is just that I am more focused and aware of my body and its capabilities in a more heighten sense now.  Last March as most of you know I broke my ankle while on holiday and was laid up for over 9 months graduating from heavy supportive casts to finally no cast at all.  I learnt a lot about injuries and how in a split second one can go from fully mobile to immobility.  It was a learning experience. Injuries, slips and falls are not the domain of one age group as some medical professionals would have us believe. Accidents/injuries happen to everyone from the baby in the stroller, the young girl with two broken wrists from rollerblading and all the age groups I encountered at therapy each week.

Not being able to walk in the forest near my home or attend my Zumba dance or yoga classes for an entire year made me realize how precious all those activities are to my daily routine and the healthy lifestyle I treasured and enjoyed.  Hence, I set about making a list of healthy practices to embrace fully for not only my body; my mind and spirit also.  I joined my first Tai Chi class in January and I am enjoying the challenge of learning the various forms (not moves as I previously thought), knowing that my body mind and spirit are fully engaged in this wonderful healing exercise.

Tai Chi is just one of many things on my list geared towards a healthy body, mind and spirit, some I had been doing for years.  Here are eleven from my long list titled: “To my Optimum Health and Well-being.”

  1. Catnap.  A 20-minute power nap after lunch (when you can) is a powerful rejuvenator.  It leaves you refreshed, alert, and ready to tackle the rest of your day filled with Vim and Vigour.   Your body and mind will thank you for it.  I discovered this wonderful pick-me-upper about 10 years ago when I was working in a Clinic with an early morning start.  We had a 2- 1/2 hour lunch and I lived 8 minutes away so that helped.  For a while, I was hesitant to share that I enjoyed napping due to the stigma attached to this wonderful de-stressor.  Then I read an article in the Huffington Post on the benefits of napping! So I came out of the Catnapping closet!
  2. Treat yourself!   Get a massage, or a facial, a Reflexology or Reiki treatment, or join a dance class.  One girl told me herself and friends went to a Pole dancing class and it was a hoot.  They laughed themselves silly for the entire time.  There are so many options and only you know what would bring you joy and make your day.  It is by no means selfish wanting to do something special for you.  Self-care and self-love is an important way of filling your cup, only then do you have enough to share with those you love.
  3. Live In the Now!  It is all we truly own and have!   I still have to give myself a reminder ever so often to keep focused in the Now when I find myself somewhere else.  Life is a Journey.  Enjoy it!  Many people miss so much because all they talk about is who they were, how they were, and where they were.  The NOW does not exist for them.  That is a very unhealthy way to live life.  Honour the Past – Live in the Now!
  4. Drink lots of Alkaline Water. Your body will thank youThis is important. I try to drink an optimal amount of water, especially when I am working as I get caught up and tend to forget that my body requires water.  The physical body relies heavily on being supplied lots of clean, toxic free, alkaline water daily in order to function optimally.  I always bless my water, sending love and gratitude to the water before drinking it.  We could not survive without water.
  5. Read – Nourish your mind. With numerous wonderful books waiting to be read I promised myself to start reading – one at a time to the end.
  6. Learn Something New each day. There are countless free online seminars and webinars about every subject known to mankind.  Find one you like and learn something new.  Your mind will love you for it.  I made a note to myself that said: “Don’t be afraid to ask questions.”  People love it when you ask them a question and they have an opportunity to share their knowledge.
  7. Watch Your Self Talk. I refuse to entertain negative self-talk or self-doubt.  It is the most crippling form of negativity there is and can kill any creativity waiting to bloom.  Be positive.    The muscles in your face will thank you!
  8. Balance is the key. Indeed! This is a reminder to me to always find the balance in everything I do.  Balance is the key to a healthy, serene, creative and productive life.  The Buddha way is:  “enjoy the gift of being alive.”
  9. Drink herbal teas. I am a tea drinker and I love trying all the herbals teas available both from the Health Food Store and my own stash.  My Naturopath recommended Nettle and Comfrey recently so I am drinking more of those. However, I still make my morning favourite starter tea a couple days a week consisting of fresh Ginger root, 1 Cinnamon stick and 10 Cardamom seeds.  Sometimes I add a bag of White or Green Tea to the mixture.  Make enough so you can have a cup during the day.
  10. Take long walks in nature.  Not being able to walk without an aid for 9 months has made me so aware of how precious it is to have a functioning body and healthy limbs. Keep moving your body even if you are working 9-5 at a desk.  Get up.  Stretch and flex your muscles and do a few minutes of deep breathing exercises. I recall getting up and doing a 10 count touch my toes exercise just to limber up from my desk.  I am sure like me, you would rather “wear out”, than “rust out!”
  11. Do something nice for someone. Either someone you know or better still someone you do not know.  It is a way of being of service to the higher energies of the universe.  People who help others seem to be the happiest and healthiest.

I would welcome your sharing your ideas and what you do for your health and well-being.

To your good health!

Sharon


EAR CONING COURSE

Ear-candling or Ear Coning is a natural ear cleansing method that has been used for
centuries. It is a non-invasive therapy that does not irritate or
traumatize the delicate internal membrane and organs of the ear and is safe when performed by a trained individual.

If you would like to learn this ancient healing art, give Sharon a call at (905) 392-1685 or email her to enquire about her Hosting a Workshop/training for you.